How to build your child’s self-esteem!

I was raised by a mom who believed in me…

Because of my mom, I know how to believe. 

Believe in myself, believe in my husband and believe in my daughter. 

I’ve written before about Emily’s self-esteem. 

Emily’s fashion choices

Karaoke
Today, I want to show you and tell you about Emily’s schoolwork. 

This first page was done at school.  

I loved her answers. 

She doesn’t believe in love at first sight, in order for a relationship to survive, you should not argue and you know your relationship is in trouble when one person quits.  
What is she looking for in her soulmate?  He needs to love dogs, the Big Bang Theory and cheerleaders. He should be tall with hazel colored eyes and love to laugh. 

Isn’t that just beautiful?

Now, the homework part. 

Emily had to define herself using this list of words.    

She read all the words and told me what they meant. Some of the words I had to explained to her. 

I had her circle the ones she felt applied to her. 

She circled 19 words. 

  1. Leader
  2. Creative
  3. Musical
  4. Funny
  5. Agreeable
  6. Honest
  7. Thoughtful
  8. Loving
  9. Family oriented
  10. Upbeat
  11. Brave
  12. Hardworking
  13. Friendly 
  14. Kind
  15. Happy
  16. Fearless 
  17. Peaceful
  18. Respectable
  19. Focused

My girl!

We needed to shorten the list and she crossed 9 off and kept her top 10.

  1. Musical
  2. Funny
  3. Honest
  4. Loving
  5. Family oriented
  6. Hardworking
  7. Friendly 
  8. Kind
  9. Happy
  10. Fearless 

We needed to define 8 and pick 5 that define her. 
 

In the end, she picked 

  1. Musical
  2. Happy
  3. Fearless
  4. Honest
  5. Funny

My girl! 

I am so proud of her!

I’ve said since day 1 that I would build Emily up so high that she would forever believe in herself. 

I think I’ve done well in her first 17 years and I promise to continue!

How do I do it?

  1. Lots of love 
  2. Tons of positive reinforcement
  3. We don’t give up or quit when it gets difficult. 
  4. We laugh a lot together and laugh at ourselves too. 
  5. We work hard
  6. We celebrate our successes, no matter how small.  

 

1st day of 11th grade

Yesterday, my really positive self was having a hard time and I wasn’t allowed (by my computer) to tell you!  Somehow my app crashed when I tried to publish my post.

I am not often down but last night, I was.

After dinner Emily wanted to do a puzzle, she started to divide the pieces than called me.  She needed help.

That’s when it hit me.  My beautiful, talented, smart, determine, courageous daughter needed help with a 100 pieces puzzle.

24 hours later, I realize it was never about the puzzle.

It was about the list of everything left to do before the beginning of school:

  1. Verify Emily’s school supplies
  2. Pack her bag
  3. Make sure she goes to bed at a reasonable time
  4. Get up earlier than usual
  5. Get the 2 of us ready for our day… and I mean that literally.
  6. Make sure Jon packs a healthy lunch and snacks
  7. Take Emily to school and walk in with her
  8. Confirm that all is in place for her
  9. Go to work
  10. Go back to school mid-day for our first IEP meeting
  11. Go back to work
  12. Go back to school a third time to pick Emily up at the end of the day
  13. Drop her home
  14. Go back to work

I don’t mind all of these things… but out of nowhere last night I remembered the summer I was 17, I had a job than moved away in the fall to go to college.  By this time, I was living on my own in Montreal…

Verify school supplies, pack her bag, help her get ready, ….

This sucks

Not for me…  ok, maybe a little bit for me but mostly for her, even if she doesn’t feel it.

This f***ing sucks!

So… because I don’t like being down and quite frankly don’t have time for it, I’ve been finding reasons to be happy.

My gorgeous daughter on her first day of 11th grade.

When we were ready for me to leave her at school this morning, she gave me a hug and tried to kiss me with those bright pink lips

My girl loves me and doesn’t care who’s looking.  That makes me super happy!

The school agreed to make an exception for us to drop and pick Emily off in what we feel is the safest way for her.  Most people don’t realize that she has mobility and balance issues because they see her in an environment that she knows.  Emily only uses one eye at the time, her depth perception is not there and when she doesn’t know her surroundings, she can’t tell if the ground is flat or not which makes it really dangerous for her…

Try imagining the challenges this presents!

The fact that the school understands this, makes me happy!Emily’s friend B is in 9th grade, after 6 or 7 years in different schools, they are reunited.  Today… they had lunch together 🙂  Emily who some people say is difficult to understand when she speaks and her friend B who uses sign language spent lunch “talking”

Those two are awesome and that makes me really happy too!

What else…..?

In a week, I am going to feel like a teenager again as Jon and I are going to see The Scorpions live in concert!  50th anniversary World Tour!  I don’t care how old they are, I am going to have a blast!

I finally got my dogs a new pillow and it hasn’t been destroyed yet!  Here’s to hoping the chewing is done because that would make me really happy!