What’s with spaghetti?

My post yesterday was supposed to be about spaghetti…

It turned into something completely different but I believe I left spaghetti in my tags….

Oups! My bad!

Spaghetti!!!

If you ever talk to my mom about Emily

…. Hopefully you speak French otherwise this conversation will not be happening ….

Anyhow…. my mom will tell you that she calls her grand daughter “poupée” (doll) and that Emily is a miracle.

My mom will tell you with tears in her eyes about the first time she visited us in our small apartment when Emily was not quite 4.

We had just moved.

I made spaghetti for dinner, I sat Emily in her chair and gave her a bowl with her spaghetti cut in small pieces. I gave her a small curved spoon and allowed her to feed herself.

She made a mess but she got some in her mouth on her own.

That to my mom was and still is a miracle. Witnessing Emily feed herself and not chocking, not vomiting.

🍝 Spaghetti!!!

It is still one of Emily’s favorite food!

In fact we had some last night when we went out for dinner.

The plate arrived, I asked for a small salad bowl and a tea spoon.

I cut it into small pieces, put it in the bowl, gave the bowl and tea spoon to Emily than she ate it.

Made no mess whatsoever.

Some people around us looked at how we prepared her food and who knows what they were thinking.

Can’t she do it?
Why is she eating in a bowl?
What’s wrong with her?
What’s wrong with her parents, why can’t they let her do it?

Who knows what they were thinking.

I know what I was thinking.

I have an amazing daughter with a good appetite. I’m lucky she can feed herself.

And every single time I see a plate of spaghetti I think about my mom’s miracle!

I am reminded of how far my daughter has come!

Do you have little things in your life to remind you of how lucky you are?

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Pick your battle

Over the weekend, Emily and I visited some of my family.

Whenever we go to my mom’s place we try to go for a big breakfast before we hit the road back. We always go to the same place.

“Chez Oeufs”

Emily orders either crêpes or a waffle covered in Nutella and bananas!!! I try whatever combination of poached eggs and hollandaise sauce I can find. This time I had artichokes, spinach and asparagus in my plate!!!

I love food! Breakfast was delicious!

Whenever we go “Chez Oeufs” we always invite anyone who wants to join us. This time we were 9 and I loved it!

As per usual, at one point or another during a family meal or a family reunion the conversation will turn to Emily.

This time was no exception. My little brother’s mother in law was commenting how she took upon herself to educate some of the guests at the christening the day before about Emily’s difference.

She had noticed them looking at Emily and decided to let them know what she knew.

I had noticed them too but was busy keeping an eye on Emily in the pool or getting her food ready or helping her change after swimming and so on…

I know I should have taken time to chat with them but I’m not comfortable doing that so it was easier to stay busy…

I know, that’s a shame but I never said I was perfect!

I should be able to talk to strangers about my daughter considering I write about her right?

Wrong!!!

Back to my story…

D. is telling us how she handled the guest’s curiosity. She did really well and they all marveled at my dedication to my child…

In my mind, I’m not any different than another parent, I just have a different reality…

But apparently to witness me take care of a tired teary 15 year old Emily made me almost a Saint in their eyes… 🙂

Ok, I’ll be a saint for now… 😇

But the truth is, I have no idea how my life would be without Emily and her challenges. I have no idea how to be a mom without being crazy in love with my kid and doing everything I can for her to have a good life.

Most of the time her physical age is irrelevant…

When she was tired and everybody was loud and she didn’t want to be there anymore, she was trying to crawl in my arms to be comforted… In that moment she was closer to 3 than she was to 15 but she still measured 5’7″

My choices were limited on how to handle the situation in order for all involved to be minimally impacted.

I decided that Emily and I would go back to my mom’s place as she had been over stimulated all day. We gave hugs and kisses to all and I kept right by her, telling her softly that we were leaving, that it was ok, that it would be quiet as soon as we would get out of the house.

Emily calmed down slightly as soon as we left.

Did I miss part of the evening? Yes!

If we had stayed, would I had been able to enjoy the evening and fun company? No!

Did I enjoy leaving? Not really!

Did I enjoy seeing Emily calm down, gaining control over her overstimulated senses? Yes

Did I enjoy her climbing to bed and falling asleep without me having to drag her there and repeatedly tell her to go to sleep? Oh yes!!!

To have tried to stay would have made things worst and wasn’t worth it.

Emily has taught me to pick me battles wisely. I’m getting better at it. I sometimes still make the wrong choices but I’m not perfect!

Can you pick your battles wisely?

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