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Pick your battle

Over the weekend, Emily and I visited some of my family.

Whenever we go to my mom’s place we try to go for a big breakfast before we hit the road back. We always go to the same place.

“Chez Oeufs”

Emily orders either crêpes or a waffle covered in Nutella and bananas!!! I try whatever combination of poached eggs and hollandaise sauce I can find. This time I had artichokes, spinach and asparagus in my plate!!!

I love food! Breakfast was delicious!

Whenever we go “Chez Oeufs” we always invite anyone who wants to join us. This time we were 9 and I loved it!

As per usual, at one point or another during a family meal or a family reunion the conversation will turn to Emily.

This time was no exception. My little brother’s mother in law was commenting how she took upon herself to educate some of the guests at the christening the day before about Emily’s difference.

She had noticed them looking at Emily and decided to let them know what she knew.

I had noticed them too but was busy keeping an eye on Emily in the pool or getting her food ready or helping her change after swimming and so on…

I know I should have taken time to chat with them but I’m not comfortable doing that so it was easier to stay busy…

I know, that’s a shame but I never said I was perfect!

I should be able to talk to strangers about my daughter considering I write about her right?


Back to my story…

D. is telling us how she handled the guest’s curiosity. She did really well and they all marveled at my dedication to my child…

In my mind, I’m not any different than another parent, I just have a different reality…

But apparently to witness me take care of a tired teary 15 year old Emily made me almost a Saint in their eyes… 🙂

Ok, I’ll be a saint for now… 😇

But the truth is, I have no idea how my life would be without Emily and her challenges. I have no idea how to be a mom without being crazy in love with my kid and doing everything I can for her to have a good life.

Most of the time her physical age is irrelevant…

When she was tired and everybody was loud and she didn’t want to be there anymore, she was trying to crawl in my arms to be comforted… In that moment she was closer to 3 than she was to 15 but she still measured 5’7″

My choices were limited on how to handle the situation in order for all involved to be minimally impacted.

I decided that Emily and I would go back to my mom’s place as she had been over stimulated all day. We gave hugs and kisses to all and I kept right by her, telling her softly that we were leaving, that it was ok, that it would be quiet as soon as we would get out of the house.

Emily calmed down slightly as soon as we left.

Did I miss part of the evening? Yes!

If we had stayed, would I had been able to enjoy the evening and fun company? No!

Did I enjoy leaving? Not really!

Did I enjoy seeing Emily calm down, gaining control over her overstimulated senses? Yes

Did I enjoy her climbing to bed and falling asleep without me having to drag her there and repeatedly tell her to go to sleep? Oh yes!!!

To have tried to stay would have made things worst and wasn’t worth it.

Emily has taught me to pick me battles wisely. I’m getting better at it. I sometimes still make the wrong choices but I’m not perfect!

Can you pick your battles wisely?


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